Community Corner - Rabbi Deborah Schuldenfrei, Head of VBS Day School

Community Corner

Rabbi Deborah Schuldenfrei, Head of VBS Day School

The Book of Why

On a sunny Los Angeles day, a few years ago, I was walking with my oldest son in our neighborhood. He is contemplative and thoughtful and there was a brief period of time, where it seemed like there was only one word in his vocabulary… ”why?”!  I remember that it was sunny, because on this particular day, he noticed his shadow. When he saw it, he quickly twisted his body around to see it closer up. When that didn’t work, even quicker than before, he twisted his body in the other direction. He said to me, “I can see it!” and in a disappointed tone “but I can’t catch it”. He continued to stare down the shadow, point his finger at it and try with tiny but exuberant might, to capture the shadow. And then he asked me, “why mommy, why is the shadow there? Why can’t I catch it? Why is it always on my other side?” It is quite incredible, when we pause and consider it, how the natural light coming from a magnificent sun in the high heavens, casts a shadow on the earth, in a near-exact reflection of our bodies. It is a wonder and a marvel. And it is also a marvel, that when we are young, we are able to exist in an endless cycle of asking “why”?

Asking “why” is one essential aspect of Jewish education. Teaching jargon refers to this as the rationale. If there is something within the school or shul, that we wish to teach, it is upon us, in addition to teaching the content, or the “what” to also help our students (children OR adults) why it is important to learn.

On a deeper level, the “why” question leads us to the essence of all wisdom, which is that as human beings we are given a holy gift of knowledge and unlike our other animal counterparts we are able to ask.

My son’s experience invites me to learn something about myself and the world. He is unsatisfied with the answers that begin with “what”. For me, these ten days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are an opportunity to learn deeply. First, I ask myself for accountability, “what actually happened”. Then when I am ready to remove another layer, I can ask “why did those things happen?” Or sometimes, “why did I respond or behave in that way?” After further exploration, I am ready to dig in further, and ask myself “who”... who will I be in the coming year.  It means a little bit of looking back, and a lot of looking forward. It means reflecting on what I have done, what has happened to me and how I responded and turning towards my future to consider better, smarter or holier outcomes. This is learning. This is growing. This is something that is very Jewish and something that is an essential human desire.

As one Valley Beth Shalom community, I wish that we will continue to be curious, grow to be courageous in our questions and kind in our reflections on ourselves and others. May this year be a good year for all of us. Shabbat shalom and g’mar chatimah tovah, may our year be sealed with an inscription in the book of captured shadows, the book of learning, and most certainly the book of why.